Valentines Day

Valentine's Day not too long away.. and if I can count correctly with all my fingers and toes, it's just 11 days away. Time when the retailers hit love fools with gimmicks of all sorts to help couple express their undying love and unwavering affections to each other. Anything from the cuddly teddies, flowers, candlelight dinners. I would like to think that love can be found in the day to day affairs. No need for a special day to say those words, "I love you". But then I'm also a sucker for flowers and gifts and cards. *sheepish grin*

So Alexis and I went to get ourselves matching glasses. Yeah nothing novel about the idea since there's already a couple in church that sports matching glasses as well. But since we're practical folks, (K maybe my other half who's the one who qualifies :P ) we thought it's more useful to have a spare pair of glasses than say a soft toy or maybe flowers. Took us forever to choose a pair of frames that's suitable for both of us, esp when you imagine how different our faces are. Me: BIG and round, Alexis: Long and narrow. But thank God for patient, friendly staff who entertained our requests for, "Yes that brown pair... No no the other one.... Erm how about the one in Red" We'll be collecting them next Sunday, I'm so excited... And now I feeling like making another pair of plastic frames, since the cost to replace the lense will probaly costs more than a pair of new glasses with lenses! Yipe yipe, I'm getting so vain. Tsk tsk...Shame on me.

Vanity Vanity. I am having one of those days when I dread my reflection in the mirror. The face that stares back looks lifeless with no colour and no vitality, eye bags, dull skin, pimples... I need a dose of vitamin E, I need more sleep, I need the sunshine, I need more love, I need more affirmation that looks are not everything. Though some will agree that while it's not everything, it is something and to some a BIG thing. If you take a look at the majority of females out there, you'll have to agree with me that most of them are looking good, looking tall, looking slim, yeah all the sweet young things. Alexis seems to agree and told me in a non-chalent manner, "yah you should lose weight" before being glued to the goggle box again. I'm one who prides in the fact that my guy doesn't not matter me being chubbier than him.. but when he said that, after my afternoon of ranting how unattractive I felt, my self esteem took a plunge. *Sulkly/ black face/ angry/ upset/ hurt* You cut me deep there brudder...

This is one reason why I should caution all girls to consider if they can accept it if your guy looks slimmer than you, has higher metabolic rate than you, have smoother, clearer complexion than you, coz when they make such comments, they don't know the amount of struggle you put up as a chubby, pimple faced girl who tries her best to lose weight and look good but still cant seem to get to their ideal esp when the world place such high emphasis on looks and beauty *shallow*. I know Alexis means no harm, but it really hurts. He knows I'm on a diet, though the only progress that I have is cut down on my food intake. He knows I'm starting to work out an exercise regime, though it's not easy with my work schedule. But come on man, I hope to think that I'm doing all these not cause I'm shallow and think that beauty and looks are all that matters but a healthy lifestyle that will contribute to my overall well being.

Anyway conclusion is, yes I did over-reacted about your comment about me having to lose weight, but do remember that I'm still trying. We both have faults too but to bicker on such trival things gets so emotionally tiring. I want to be more open to your comments. You be more supportive too, thank you. And sorry for the needless quarrel.