My colleague took me out for coffee today and broke the news that she's going to resign. I was half expecting to hear it but didn't expect it to be so since she's been here for less than half a year. But I suppose she already knows what she wants and I wish her well. Just that what lies ahead for me will be a nightmare since it will be just down to me. Why did I ask to go into products development. And to think that she was probably thanking her lucky stars that she has me to fall back on.
SO so so determined to move on. It's time,it's time. Where is my heart following?
Tuesday, October 18, 2005
Friday, October 14, 2005
Face looking a little less pau-like now. But still feels sore and a little painful. Suspect that I may have an infection cause it's taking a longer time to recover.
It's pouring outside now, perfect for an afternoon nap. But I'm not much of a nap person, now just busying myself packing my room. It's funny how I'm always in this "tidy room" mode whenever I'm on MC. The condition of my room is such that I can leave it so messy until I can't stand the sight of the mess then I'll start to clear out stuffs big time. Alexis just dreads hearing that and he's praying that I'll learn to be less tolerant of mess and keep our home spick and span. Perhaps I should learn a trick or two on tidying the house with a twitch of my nose, think Sabrina the witch. Kidding..
Was clearing out my old journals and notebooks which I seem to have plenty of becasue I can rarely get down to finishing one before starting a new one. And some of these actually date back to 1995! And also clearing out copies of the Revival Tesimonies. But as I thank God for His goodness in so many of these wonderful testimonies, I also feel sadden by the many faces that are no longer in CP. Some of whom have gone to join other families, but also some of whom have left the family. Makes me wonder how we can be so ungrateful to God... Puzzles me how our relationship with God is determined by other factors other that God himself. But as I read my journal, it made me see how I have also changed. Perhaps more cautious, more reserved, more guarded in letting my emotions and feelings show. That I have become more cautious to be undiginifed for God and not being so garang to "chiong" for God.
And at cell, we're talking about how our work environment prevents us from being the christians that we want to be. To be more bold to share out faith. But it's all about seizing opportunities and daring to be different. I'm still learning and while it's not natural yet, I pray one day it will be.
It's pouring outside now, perfect for an afternoon nap. But I'm not much of a nap person, now just busying myself packing my room. It's funny how I'm always in this "tidy room" mode whenever I'm on MC. The condition of my room is such that I can leave it so messy until I can't stand the sight of the mess then I'll start to clear out stuffs big time. Alexis just dreads hearing that and he's praying that I'll learn to be less tolerant of mess and keep our home spick and span. Perhaps I should learn a trick or two on tidying the house with a twitch of my nose, think Sabrina the witch. Kidding..
Was clearing out my old journals and notebooks which I seem to have plenty of becasue I can rarely get down to finishing one before starting a new one. And some of these actually date back to 1995! And also clearing out copies of the Revival Tesimonies. But as I thank God for His goodness in so many of these wonderful testimonies, I also feel sadden by the many faces that are no longer in CP. Some of whom have gone to join other families, but also some of whom have left the family. Makes me wonder how we can be so ungrateful to God... Puzzles me how our relationship with God is determined by other factors other that God himself. But as I read my journal, it made me see how I have also changed. Perhaps more cautious, more reserved, more guarded in letting my emotions and feelings show. That I have become more cautious to be undiginifed for God and not being so garang to "chiong" for God.
And at cell, we're talking about how our work environment prevents us from being the christians that we want to be. To be more bold to share out faith. But it's all about seizing opportunities and daring to be different. I'm still learning and while it's not natural yet, I pray one day it will be.
Wednesday, October 12, 2005
Adam was walking round the garden one day looking miserable. God said to him, "What's wrong with you?" Adam said "I'm lonely, I've got nothing to do, I've named all the animals and I'm bored." So God said, "I could make you a woman if you like." Adam replied, "What would that be like?"
"Well", said the LORD, "she'd be kind of like you but kind of different. She'd be very beautiful and just looking at her would knock your socks off. If she kissed you you'd think you were going to faint. You'd find her ravishing, gorgeous, amazing. She would think you were the centre of the universe. She'd passionately love you, bear children for you, cook and clean for you. She'd get up in the night if the kids cried, she'd never complain about how little you do, if you ever had an argument she would apologise and say it must have been her fault."
"Wow", replied Adam. "That sounds fantastic. I bet a woman like that would be very expensive." "You better believe it", said the Lord, "She'd cost you an arm and a leg." "An arm and a leg?", replied Adam. "Tell me, what could I get for a rib?" And that's where all the trouble started.
"Well", said the LORD, "she'd be kind of like you but kind of different. She'd be very beautiful and just looking at her would knock your socks off. If she kissed you you'd think you were going to faint. You'd find her ravishing, gorgeous, amazing. She would think you were the centre of the universe. She'd passionately love you, bear children for you, cook and clean for you. She'd get up in the night if the kids cried, she'd never complain about how little you do, if you ever had an argument she would apologise and say it must have been her fault."
"Wow", replied Adam. "That sounds fantastic. I bet a woman like that would be very expensive." "You better believe it", said the Lord, "She'd cost you an arm and a leg." "An arm and a leg?", replied Adam. "Tell me, what could I get for a rib?" And that's where all the trouble started.
Tuesday, October 11, 2005
It hurts... HURTS!!
Still looking pau like and it's so sensitive. But I went ahead to have my hotcakes for breakfast anyhow. In small, tiny whiny bites, Almost baby size bites.
Been feeling lazy and tired. Had disturb sleep last night. I "drooled" on my pillow but it was blood and not saliva, in the end my pillow got stained. Not a pleasant sight. Feeling sleepy again. Shall hit the sack and may tomorrow be a more eventful day for me :)
Still looking pau like and it's so sensitive. But I went ahead to have my hotcakes for breakfast anyhow. In small, tiny whiny bites, Almost baby size bites.
Been feeling lazy and tired. Had disturb sleep last night. I "drooled" on my pillow but it was blood and not saliva, in the end my pillow got stained. Not a pleasant sight. Feeling sleepy again. Shall hit the sack and may tomorrow be a more eventful day for me :)
Monday, October 10, 2005
Napping didn't leave me feeling better. In fact I think I feel worse coz my lips are all dry and I feel like I've been boxed in my right side of the face. Having a worse headache too. I'm just so not a nap person.
On 5 days MC, the only "perk" of losing my wisdom tooth. I must be quite insane to think that way. But I could do with the rest and the time to do some things which I haven't had the time to do.
On 5 days MC, the only "perk" of losing my wisdom tooth. I must be quite insane to think that way. But I could do with the rest and the time to do some things which I haven't had the time to do.
My visit to the dentist left me with 2 wisdom tooth short. Didn't expect to get it done today, but since I am on MC anyway so might as well. Extracted the top right one while the bottom one had to be drilled before she could extract it.
I sat there squirming away as she drilled and I was praying that she wouldn't hurt me. She used so much pressure to hold me down and pull out the tooth that it has left me with a headache now. But my mouth and tongue is still numb and it feels wierd. But I think the pain is slowly kicking in now. So I better hurry along to sleep and not get bothered about the pain.
I sat there squirming away as she drilled and I was praying that she wouldn't hurt me. She used so much pressure to hold me down and pull out the tooth that it has left me with a headache now. But my mouth and tongue is still numb and it feels wierd. But I think the pain is slowly kicking in now. So I better hurry along to sleep and not get bothered about the pain.
Thursday, October 06, 2005
What's with the weather? Even the aircon doesn't seem to help. I'm so hot! Alexis if you read this, remember we MUST have aircon in our room next time at full blast. I rather be hiding under the covers than sweat in the heat. Oh well, enough of whining..
Today at Power @ Work, we discussed on the secrets of Winning @ Work. Talking about how God places us in jobs that we are gifted for and where our talenst lies. These were some of the questions that we discussed.
1. What do you like to talk about most? Usually our conversations fall into these categories
a)things we hate
b)things we love &
c)things we fear
2. What books and TV programme do we enjoy the most?
3. If you could do anything in the world, knowing that we would not fail, what would you choose to do?
4. If you knew that God granted your request, what would you attempt to do today with your life?
5. What do you wants others to say about your life when you've gone to meet the Lord.
I was considering these thoughts not too long ago when I was seriously contemplating a job switch. But somehow that didn't come to pass to my disappointment and perhaps God's timing. I was listening to a conversation that my colleagues were having and it made me feel like I had to take action soon. "After working at a job for 6 months, you'll know if you're suited for it." And after hearing our big boss talking about his strategy on how he wants to position our investments "People always fear risk and therefore do not dare to invest. However that they do not know if that by no doing anything, they are in more risk."
And here I am being in the same job, same place for 2 years. Maybe about time to take some risk. Not that I'm not enjoying my job, but if I'm, than why these thoughts? I just dun feel in my element the more I work here. While I have asked for great responsibilities in my job scope, I feel very unguided and lost. There is something within that is almost screaming out with restless that I want to take steps to do the things I really want to. And while the job's not that bad, the colleagues are nice too and while it does seem like a decent and good job, the politics is quite a different story. And the people that we have to "fight" with, gosh is just so tiring. And I'm just not cut out for this investment, banking industry. Coz I never cared much about it... Question mark as to why I'm here too. Ha Guess when I was first offered the job, it was more of a grab first then see how.
But God has been so so good to me, that this is my first job in a big organization and learnt so much. For the pple who have groomed me and have given me chances to grow and develop.
Being at the crossroad again...
God light the way.
Today at Power @ Work, we discussed on the secrets of Winning @ Work. Talking about how God places us in jobs that we are gifted for and where our talenst lies. These were some of the questions that we discussed.
1. What do you like to talk about most? Usually our conversations fall into these categories
a)things we hate
b)things we love &
c)things we fear
2. What books and TV programme do we enjoy the most?
3. If you could do anything in the world, knowing that we would not fail, what would you choose to do?
4. If you knew that God granted your request, what would you attempt to do today with your life?
5. What do you wants others to say about your life when you've gone to meet the Lord.
I was considering these thoughts not too long ago when I was seriously contemplating a job switch. But somehow that didn't come to pass to my disappointment and perhaps God's timing. I was listening to a conversation that my colleagues were having and it made me feel like I had to take action soon. "After working at a job for 6 months, you'll know if you're suited for it." And after hearing our big boss talking about his strategy on how he wants to position our investments "People always fear risk and therefore do not dare to invest. However that they do not know if that by no doing anything, they are in more risk."
And here I am being in the same job, same place for 2 years. Maybe about time to take some risk. Not that I'm not enjoying my job, but if I'm, than why these thoughts? I just dun feel in my element the more I work here. While I have asked for great responsibilities in my job scope, I feel very unguided and lost. There is something within that is almost screaming out with restless that I want to take steps to do the things I really want to. And while the job's not that bad, the colleagues are nice too and while it does seem like a decent and good job, the politics is quite a different story. And the people that we have to "fight" with, gosh is just so tiring. And I'm just not cut out for this investment, banking industry. Coz I never cared much about it... Question mark as to why I'm here too. Ha Guess when I was first offered the job, it was more of a grab first then see how.
But God has been so so good to me, that this is my first job in a big organization and learnt so much. For the pple who have groomed me and have given me chances to grow and develop.
Being at the crossroad again...
God light the way.
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